Strong yet weak...

There is so much happening in my life, yet...nothing has actually really happened! Demons stirring me up emotionally and psychologically - mental block, emotional downpour, mood swings, stress, etc, etc, etc. I feel like there is a mental race in everything I do and yet I'm not really doing anything? It's a strange feeling. I'm tired, yes I am...you demons, bugger off! Leave me alone...

Bear with me while I sort these little shits out...

p/s: I don't know how I got sucked into this downward spiral...Must be something in the chilly Brissy air...

Pictures of You...

Pictures of You 

(By The Last Goodnight)

This is the clock up on the wall

This is the story of us all

This is the first sound

Of a new born child before he starts to crawl

This is the war that's never won

This is the soldier and his gun

This is the mother waiting by the phone

Praying for her son

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Hung up on your wall for the world to see

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Remind us all of what we used to be

There is a drug that cures it all

Blocked by the governmental wall

We are the scientists inside the lab

Just waiting for the call

This earthquake weather has got me shaking

Inside I'm high up and dry

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Hung up on your wall for the world to see

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Remind us all of what we used to be

Confess to me every secret moment

Every stolen promise you believe

Confess to me, all that lies between us

All that lies between you and me

We are the boxers in the ring

We are the bells that never sing

There is a title we can't win

No matter how hard we must swing

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Hung up on the wall for the world to see

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Remind us all of what we could have been

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Hung up on your wall for the world to see

Pictures of you, pictures of me

Remind us all of what we could have been

Could have been, we could have been

Picture of you, pictures of me

Remind us all of what we could have been

~*X*~

Rest assured pictures of us will be kept safely within a special place in my heart...locked away, and sealed with happy smiles...Pictures of us, history of the past...With this I congratulate you and your wife-to-be, wishing you well as you've finally found a happy ending to this chapter of your life...

~XOXO~

6 years ago, I celebrated by 18th birthday...

My colleague turned 18 today and she asked me what happened on my 18th birthday as she swore to never forget this joyous occasion of her life forever. 

I was dumbfolded when I learnt that I could not remember a thing! "Oh shit!" This is not funny. I tried so hard, as if I was madly searching for a needle in a haystack, the feeling was tremendously frustrating. It took me a few minutes before I could utter something out of my mouth. I just plainly said, "like you, I had so much fun!". But really, what fun?? I cannot even remember a thing. I then sat down, pretended to be using so much brain power for work and made myself squeeze every drop of memory juice out of the memory bank and this is what I gathered:

I had a surprise party planned for my 18th birthday! It all started with a long drive to One Utama where all 3 of us, Alison, Jessie and myself were dressed in black. Upon arriving we had to wait outside the restaurant for ages. Apparently we cannot be let in until they had to set the table up for the 3 of us. And so I waited patiently. While waiting, I met my friend, Bee Voon and I was totally surprised. We exchanged hugs and she said she was meeting a friend and so I let her go and promised to catch up. After a couple of suspicious minutes later, Aaron appeared at the door to welcome me into the restaurant and I was fully taken by surprise! There was a video camera and camera flashes when the doors were opened. And gee, all my friends were gathered there...Ee Jhane, Bee Voon (liar, she was late!), Renee, Elaine, Amelia, Kar Wye, Mei Chin, Evan, Bryan, Aidan, Koks, Steven, and some other college friends which I apologise for not being able to remember their names. Was a fantastic evening. Everyone was in black. I received a few presents, one being a jumper I've been eyeing on since forever from Miss Selfridge, few bottles of alcoholpop in celebration of my officially legal drinking age and a beautiful diamond pendent and a matching necklace. That's all I can remember. Of all the presents, the only thing I still possess is the jumper. Of all my friends, the only ones I still contact are a hand-full out of the lot. 

I wish things hadn't changed, I wish those friends never left, I wish I never left, I wish forever and ever meant forever and ever, I wish to re-visit every single detail, I wish to feel the happiness I felt, I wish life to be always a happy-18-year-old..I wish, and I wish, and I wish, and all I can do is *wish*...

We are watching Opera!!

This was the conversation between John and I on the way home from work last week...

John: Hey, we're going to watch Oprah!

Michelle: Okay...(in my head I was wondering, is Oprah Winfery hosting her talk show here?)

John: Is next week good for you?

Michelle: Should be fine, but is Oprah in Brisbane??

John: Yaaaaa...Like as if you didn't know??

Michelle: Oprah Winfery is in Australia?!?!?!? 

John: Nooooooo laaaaaaaa!! Why would we want to watch The Oprah Winfery Show?!?!?

Michelle: Huh?? Then??

John: Phantom of the Opera laaaaaaaaa!! 

Michelle: Oppsies!! *laughs uncontrollably thinking what an idiot she was*

John and I will be watching Phantom of the Opera on 25th April 2008 (which is the NZ day public holiday too!)...woohoooooo!! 

The white mask, the stalk of red rose and Andrew Lloyd Webber...I make sure I got it right this time around!!

International Food Festival

Tomorrow is our annual International Food Festival at our college. 

All students and staff are invited to cook a traditional dish of their culture. 

Gosh, cooking is not exactly my cup of tea...last year I fried mee-hoon which I swear not to ever do again because I was up until 1am trying to fry so much mee-hoon for 2 billion people, I had mee-hoon everywhere in the kitchen, it nearly killed me. It is at times like this when I desperately wish I was at the comfort of my own home where I can just pick up the phone and ring good-old-grandma! "Hello, po-po ar, I need some food for my 28 classmates for International Smiling Day (or some whatever celebration)" My grandma would just whack up some fried mee-hoon in less than 1 hour (she makes it look so super easy!!) or head to the markets to pick up some fresh (yummilicious) sponge cake...OOOoOoOoLaLa...!! 

Anyway, back to reality...I'm here thousands of miles away from good-old-grandma...a decision has been made, I'm making some KUNYAKU JELLY!! Heck if that is not Malaysian...siapa kisah?!?!?!? As long as I bring some food, which in this case...Asian food!!

Speaking of KUNYAKU JELLY, I had my moment of glory with it...As not many of you know, I taught in a kindy before I started college back in those days. During Teachers' Day, one of my students' parent bought me a super huge box of pretty looking yet yummy tasting KUNYAKU JELLY!! Such a moment pride, when I looked into the super huge box of shiny, colourful jelly staring at back at me...woahhhhhhh...such a not-too-bad cikgu I was!! I remembered hogging the box of jelly home and smiling from cheek to cheek bragging to my grandparents what I model cikgu I was to deserve such a lovely gift (I also had a total of 1 million photo frames, a few clocks and a few bouquets of flowers...okay I stretched the truth a bit, but seriously I had so many photo frames, it was not funny!)!! I can't believe I actually thought for a split second that I was a model teacher, hahahahhaha!! What subject did I teach?? ART!! Hahahahhahahh!! Well, that is what you do when you are 17 okay - think of yourself as invincible!! At least I know my self-esteem was all along on track, hahahahha!!

Anyway, back to the subject, I made some KUNYAKU JELLY...

Present for Someone Special...

John's birthday is around the corner...

Michelle doesn't know what birthday present to get him *scratches head madly*

I've got a few ideas:

1) Lomographic Fisheye Camera #2

He's into photography, I thought he might like a special camera which captures picture in a fisheye view. It's pretty cute, I like it. Now except, it uses film and knowing John, he wouldn't really like the idea.  

2) Tripod

He did say he needs a tripod BUT who in the world would dream of getting someone a freaking tripod as a birthday present?? Not me, therefore I'm not keen! But if all else fails, I know what to get la. This would be my fall back plan. 

3) Electric Guitar

This is a little over my budget but I think I might have a fat chance of fall for it! The fact that I will be leaving him here in August, he will be left all by himself and if he there is something he would invest his time on, I'd rather it be an electric guitar! Well, he's no pro at it...he can play the acoustic guitar and now he would like to learn electric. Hence the super idea for an electric guitar! He does have a few good musically inclined genes (as compared to yours truly!). Then again, would he invest time in sharpening his skills or is it just a hangat-hangat tahi ayam kinda thing??

4) Crumpler Laptop Bag

Okay, John does have quite a collection of bags. Does he really need to add one more to it? I don't think so. But this would be an easy present coz I know exactly what he wants and where to buy.

Well this is not too bad actually...I've got a few ideas...I just have work out which one to pick. I hate making decisions, but I'm a big girl now I better start having a mind of my own!! 

BBQ stinks!

Okay, barbeque sticks! As if you didn't know that yet!??!?!?

Today as part of my job description which includes "...and other relevant responsibilities given", I had to barbeque! For the first time in my life, I had to cook a massive lot of onions to feed hundreds of hungry students. And so I got right into it by ripping open a 1kg bag of sliced up onion and shoved my hand right in to grab a few hand-full of onion for the flaming hot pit. Now this was at 12pm okay. The time now is 11:30pm and I swear my hand smells like some disgusting body odour of some random person who's forgotten to shower for daysssssss!! 

I do cook occasionally and therefore fiddling with onions is no big deal to me. BUT seriously, my hand had never smelt this bad before! I am not kidding you, the smell of my hand makes me want to puke! Ewwwwwww!

Note to all: When (need be) to deal with large volume of chopped up onions, please do not attempt direct contact with any part of your skin to avoid vomiting sensation (you will thank me for this warning!). 

MH140 left for KL from Brisbane at 0015

Dad has left for home...no tears at the airport, very well done on my part!! =) In fact this has never happened before. I would usually flood the airport whenever I leave my parents or vice versa. 

HOWEVER, there were a few tears on the way home...

Text message from dad to Mich:

4got 2 fill the immigration form thats why took so long. Take care n love u! 

Text message from Mich to dad:

Do you need to fill a form? Returning home wad, oh actually have 2! I forgot 2 mention! 2 happy that all 30 kg luggage were through, he he! Have a safe and comfy flight home. See you in August! Love u lots! Muaks! If ur hand still bleeding, please ask the air steward for a band aid. 

Text message from dad to Mich:

Ok, bye n love u, nite nite!

Text message from Mich to dad:

Opps, no one 2 cover blanket 4 me 2nite! Nvm, 4 more months I'll be home! Love u lots! =)

Text message from dad to Mich:

(>"*<)

  (-,-) zzzZ!

(")-<')

sshh ..it's me putting a blanket on you, so that you won't get cold, have a warm & good nite sleep! Sweet dreams ~ love daddy.

Text message from Mich to dad:

Ha ha! Thank u! :) I'll sleep tight now! Good night! :)

Text message from dad to Mich:

Hope teddy will do a good job 2nite.

Almost boarding. Will sms u on arrival. Love u. Nite nite!

Yes, daddy's girl I am! For as long as I lived at home, or whenever dad's around, he tucks me in bed. I would crawl into my bed and after I've fallen asleep, he would sneak into my room and make sure all 4 ends of my blankie touch the 4 corners of my bed so that I would be tucked in warm and cosy. 

p/s: I love you dad!

Body Piercing?

21/03/2008

Mom: Dad's going to Brisbane next week.

Mich: Yay! I get to have dad for a week!

Mom: Ya, please don't fight...

Mich: Don't worry, we will not! 

27/03/2008

Mich: Dad, can I please get my belly pierced?

Dad: Better not...

Mich: Give me 3 good reasons.

Dad: Let me have a think about it first. 

Mich: Okay, now tell me why?

Dad: 1) Because you are normal - normal people don't do abnormal things 

Mich: But I want to be an individual!

Dad: 2) You don't want to deform yourself intentionally

Mich: But piercing is not deforming oneself, it can heal back if you decide to take it off. 

Dad: 3) Why would you want to inflict pain on yourself?

Mich: It's not going to be painful! Even if it does hurt, I would be the one bearing the pain!

Dad: Better not la...Your mom won't be very happy about it.

Mich: Ish (and pouts and sulks!)!

Dad's usually my partner in crime, but guess he's not big on body piercing. I would understand why he would object to a tattoo, but piercing?!?!?!?! I nearly managed to convince him when we walked by a jewellery shop selling belly rings. I nearly succeeded but in the end went home without a piercing yet again! ISH!

Anyway, dad's going home in 2 days...maybe I can get my belly pierced next week? *evil grin* Hahahhahaha!!

We haven't had any fights so far (sorry to disappoint you mom, hahahahah!!), just ongoing debate on belly piercing which heats up once in a while within the week. 

*I wonder why would a 24 year old seek permission from her parents to get her belly pierced? Pretty strange, but that's just me, welcome to my world!* ^_^

Does your boss bake?

Girafeee the sore neck giraffe!

Lay-by not so bad afterall

I've finally picked up my lay-by dress!!

I've waited one long week before I can call it MINE!! 

What's best is that I took advantage of the 25% off...WooHooOoOooOoooo!!

I refunded and repurchased (the sales person taught me the trick!)...

Was the wait worth it??

At least the 25% off made up for the anger burst from last week.

Will I lay-by again??

...Erm, don't think so!!

Lay-by

Lay-by, you basically pay a holding deposit on an item you want but don't really want to pay for it yet. In simple words, you cannot afford but cannot resist wanting ownership of the item. I call it, cheapskate way of shopping!! I have always been against the idea of lay-by. To me, if you cannot afford it, don't buy it!! 

Today, I became a victim of lay-by and I am so totally pissed at myself!! Why?!?!?! Because, the dress looked stunning and the moment I tried it on, I know it's going to be MINE regardless how much the tag says. As I was about to pay, someone told me to put it on lay-by (and he knows I'm totally against it, but somehow he always thinks I have no money, hence he always suggest lay-by!!). Why?!?!??!? "Just put it on lay-by la, nest week when you have more money then come and pay for it!" And, and...and I can't believe I succumbed to it!! I freaking wonder why?!?!?!? I have the money to pay for it...the dress is not that pricey after all. But why did I freaking listen to someone else's opinion - which isn't even beneficial at all!! What's the point of getting the dress next week when I want it NOW?!?!?!??! And to add to it, to lay-by an item, you have to pay an extra non-refundable $5 for service fee and the most important thing is that I WON'T BE ABLE TO WEAR THAT DRESS TOMORROW!!!!!!!!! Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

Please just SHUT UP the next time you shop with me. If you opinion will not be beneficial, please just shut up!! Heard of the saying, "if you have nothing good to say, say nothing"!?!??!?!? This is when this saying come in real handy!! 

Shopping tip: Never bring a cheapskate shopping with you!! SUCKS!!

Michelle the Addict!

I've been shopping madly these days and it's becoming a problem. I acknowledge the problem - I'm a bargain sucker and my adrenalin pumps whenever I see SAVINGS!! Although some things (most things actually) I buy, I don't need them, they are more just to soothe my addiction. I'm addicted to bargains!! How can I not buy these shoes when they were discounted from the original price of $149.95 to $99 and now, final reduction 50% of the reduced price?!?!?!??!?! Tell me how can anyone resist?!?!?!?!? As a result, over the past 3 weeks, i purchased 5 pairs of shoes!! Clothes bargains were equally as bad!! Cutest pair of shorts from Sportsgirl, from $59.95 down to $29.95. As a result, I bought a pair in White, a pair in Mint and another pair in Yellow!! I also bought a few dresses. One of them, the best bargain among the lot were from $99 down to $70 and 50% off the reduced price. To my *surprise* *surprise* at the checkout, the dress was down to $50 and %50 off $50 makes it $25!! I also bought singlets from Giordano to wear as layers and they were from $25 down to $10!! All these bargains are seriously driving me insane!! I buy and buy and buy and get soooooooooo hyped up when I see the discount tags being thrown in my faceeeeeeeeeee!! Please don't get me started on lingerie and pyjamas!! I'm a serial shopper!!

Michelle: Hi all! My name is Michelle and I'm a Shopaholic.

Shopaholic Anonymous: Hi Michelle! We welcome you!

Second month of 2008...

Lots happened in this fresh new 2008:

1) Edison Chen and Cecelia Cheung Scandal

This I personally think is stupid! Why is the public so concerned over some fellow's personal life that it has been known as the 9-11 of Hong Kong's entertainment industry?!?!?!? What about spending the time and effort finding solutions to rectify our filthy environment?? Is there any positive impact for speculating scandals as such?!?!?!? It's their business, their problem!! Too bad, too sad for them!! 

2) The passing of the great "Happy Fruit" of Hong Kong, the late Lydia Shum

This I feel a little upset. Afterall, I grew up watching "Happy Fruit" in TVB movies, talk shows, reality programs and game shows. I'm sure TVB fans will miss her laughter and most of all her very cheerful and bubbly personality. She left behind her 20 year old only daughter and I do sincerely hope she remains strong through this whole mourning process. 

3) Queensland is flooding

From drought to flood! Not easy being the weather man here in Queensland. Changes from one extreme to the other. One minute we had farmers committing suicide as their crops dry up and die and the next we had people drowning and being swept away by the flood waters. Not complaining with the down pour of rain as the level of water restriction will stop rising and that would mean we can clean ourselves better when in the shower. 

4) Interest rates rise (again!)

This is not funny at all. Everything is rising in price - interest rates, fuel, groceries --> necessities!! But we've not heard of this one very important thing rising - our wages!! How would an average income earner cope with this?? Only God knows!!

Valentine's Day 2008

No flowers, no chocolate for me this year (not that I fancy being part of the victims of overpriced florists!)...

We only managed to book for a table for dinner at SONO last night - was a disaster!! Not the food but we argued over some mundane shit - as we do!!

Dinner was (as usual) good with a very tensed atmosphere as both head-strong people were not prepared to give in - welcome to our world!!

This afternoon however I had my surprise(!) I had lunch delivered to me at work. I had my favourite Chicken Namban, Taro milk tea with herbal jelly (slurpsssss!!) and a box of variety of 4 beard papa dessert! Yummy-dooooo-dahhhhhh!! 

Got picked up from work to get home (although home from work is only a mere 7 minutes stroll up and down the hill and up again), and was given a stalk of origami rose, hahahha!! Apparently, someone learnt to fold it on You Tube!! They do teach you some useful stuff in the cyber space these days!! For those of you who didn't manage to buy any overpriced roses for this occasion, perhaps try You Tube!! =)

My Addiction

I have quite a serious addiction ---> SHOPPING!!

My colleague and I have concluded that I shop out of boredom. 

There's nothing much to do here in Brisbane, therefore I shop. 

Shopping becomes a comfort thing because I link that to my shopping-Sundays in KL with my family. 

Each time I hit the shops, I spend money. 

Spending too much money unnecessarily is worrying...becomes a problem...an addiction problem!

p/s: Myers is having crazy clearance sale...50% off already reduced shoes, discounted lingerie from $5!! Hurry, check it out...sale won't last!!

Lesson No. ONE!!

Lesson No. One: Never lift up the cover of a covered toilet bowl in public toilets!!

I always get bitten...always bitten and never shy, that's me!!

Disgusting art work of mother nature is what I see each time I lift open covered toilet bowls in public toilets. Each time I remind myself never to let such mishap happen again - "If the toilet bowl is covered, leave it and move on to the next cubicle!" But over and over again, Michelle thinks to herself, "Aha, covered toilet bowl! Means some clean freak covered the bowl while flushing!" Wrong AGAIN!! How many times can one be wrong??

Folks, if you never get anything from reading my posts, please at least get this one in your head. A friendly reminder to all: NEXT TIME YOU SEE A COVERED TOILET BOWL, MOVE ON TO THE NEXT CUBICLE!!

Home Alone

What do I do when I'm home alone??

• Tidy up my room
• Blast the music
• Watch "Raising Helen" half-way
• Out to dinner with friends
• Paint my finger and toe nails
• AND I DON'T WANNA GO TO BED KNOWING I'M HOME ALONE!!

I think I'm so very spoilt to the core. I don't like being home alone and I think it all boils down to laziness...At least when he is at home, he does the cooking, cleaning, washing, bringing me water, passing me the remote control, bringing in the daily mail, empty the bins, bring in the wheelie bin, tug me in bed and turn off the lights!! 

I don't wanna go to bed because I don't like switching off the lights and walking into my bed in the dark!!

It's been decided...

I'm sick of Brisbane, it is time to move on...

Here is the plan...

I will be moving back to KL for approximately 2 years to further my studies in Managerial Psychology and at the same time (hopefully) gain some work experience in the field of corporate training/HR. Once my two years is up in KL, I'll probably be so irritated and agitated by the politics happening that I'd wanna escape the country. I will then return to Australia and hopefully start a new chapter of my life in my favourite city, Melbourne!! =) 

Sounds like a good plan?? Ahhahahah, that's the ideal plan...so let's all keep our fingers crossed, and hope for my reality to unfold the way I desire!

The tentative date for this plan to take action is set to be some time in mid September, and hopefully hit the books in November. 

As part of my performance review last year, my boss promised that she will try to persuade the Marketing Director to let me go on a marketing trip to Hong Kong (yay!)/East Malaysia (boo!). My boss has recently told me that the trip could take place in September. Grrrrr...every time she talks about the trip in September, I feel so darn guilty!! (I obviously have not told her my intentions). I'm suppose to give one month's notice, but because my boss is so nice to me, I've decided to give 3...and that will not happen till June. Looks like I'll have to feel the guilt for the next 4 months. *sighz*