I'm not one who likes to show off, simply because it's simple enough that I know I'm not. I know how uncomfortable it is for the receiving party when people brag on about what's new and dear to them. Although I know sometimes that we cannot help but get so caught up in our own happiness that we put others down or unconsciously describe ourselves in lingo such as "us" versus "them". I know I don't like to be put in such situation and therefore, I am very careful as not to put anyone through such agony.
However, this is slowly becoming a problem for me as nowadays I adopt the idea that whenever I share good news with others, I am highlighting my happiness, and that to me is almost becoming a taboo. It's almost like me telling people about my success would mean that I'm putting myself on the pedestal. As a result, many at times, I find that I hesitate a lot to share good news with others. I'm not sure if I cannot or I dare not express myself. "Cannot" because I'm afraid that I may offend others who are probably not on the same boat as myself and "dare not" for the fear of losing such happiness too early, too soon.
So what exactly is my problem? I cannot be happy for myself? I cannot express happiness? This sometimes frustrates me as I hear other people brag and go on and on and on about their satisfaction in life. When they do tell me something pleasant about their lives/jobs/relationships/families/etc, I do get very excited for them. In fact, I love to hear happy reports from poeple. I really do feel happy for them and I genuinely smile from the inside as I embrace their news as my own. It's really effortless for me to be happy for others, but how come when it comes to dealing with my own happiness, I feel a sense of guardedness??
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