EE JHANE...This sweetie pie is my jelly friend!
The one and only jelly that I haven't seen in ages and I miss her sooooooooooooo!
She is my one and only sAn-dA-nAs-tA-nAh nutty friend!
She is the best in the world!
She is very generous with her bed space, she is the keeper of my visiting toothbrush, she is my listening ear at 3am in the morning, she is my mood-lifter on my boo-boo days, she is my happy smiling face, she is my surprise caller, she is my darling, she is my comfort pillow, she is my laughing machine, she is my partner in crime and most of all she's my FRIEND!
Woman, to our friendship and our toothbrushes! *CheeRs!*

SHOPPING MODE...Whoever doesn't enjoy shopping should really get prayed for! Shopping is a therapy that works wonders for whatever not-so-good-day you have. My ultimate ambition is to be a shopaholic! All I do is shop! The moment I open my eyes, I just pop by a nearby shopping mall and start shopping till the sun goes down, then have a fancy dinner at a cafe by the mall and then end my day by going home to indulge in all the new stuff I've bought and repeat the same routine the next day except I go further and further each time and ultimately fly to Paris to shop and come home before the next morning to fly off to some other country! Wow...*dream come true* Let's just say I'm naive and being in an ignorant world like mine, I'm allowed to dream a little dream from time to time...

Anyway today I went to the toyshop with John to pick up a birthday gift for Brigette who will be turning 3 on Saturday. After spending approximately 45 minutes in the shop looking at some toys which caught my attention, I finally picked up something for Brigy and myself *grin*. I got Brigy a Barbie doll (I had my first Barbie doll when I was 3 or 4 and I absolutely loved it, so I would think Brigy would have the same reaction as I did) and got myself a box of Ello creation system! At the age of 22, I still love toys as much as when I was 2! *winK*

Also in my shopping bag, I've got a couple of boring black clothings for work! *rolls eyes!*

Later in the day, I had more damage to my pocket when I went to see day-light-robery doctor. Consultation alone cost me $60 and medication another $35! I'd rather itch to death than to see a doctor if I knew it would cost me that much! Well reason why I went to see a doctor was 1) John forced me to (he was being very caring, he didn't want me to risk it) and 2) because my hands were swelling and the itch nearly drove me up the wall! I don't know what went wrong there, I would think it's the cat from Melissa's place but apparently, according to the doctor cats won't make such damage. So, I have no idea...it could be an insect bite, could be allergy or it could be an infection. I'm put on antihistamine and some antibiotics. *Sigh!*
But anyway, Alvin's made my day better by sending me to the clinic, thanks Alvin!
And of course the toys cheered me up and put my mind off the medical bills for a moment! *smiles*

p/s: See the red carpet in the picture?? That's a gift from John from Ikea to beautify my room! *AwwWwWwwWwwWwww!*

Must be the GREEN TEA FRAPPE! I think I'm high on caffeine at the moment and I'm not able to sleep! My body is tired but my mind is racing and it doesn't seem to wanna switch off! Adrenalin is pumping hard when the body is more than ready for bed. Now what's going on? I need to jump out of bed at 7am tomorrow and this insomnia is totally not helping! Should have had babychino instead (I had my first cup of babychino ever in my life last night and I instantly fell in love with it! So frothy, so creamy and so chocolaty! Dunk marshmellows in it and it's ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...just thought of sharing my babychino experience! *smiles*). Anyway, Mil, John and I had a great time strolling around the city today. As much as we try resisting not to spend a cent, both Mil and I couldn't get by shopping without spending. Somehow the desire to bring something home overpowered the piggybank at home.
p/s: And btw I thought I'd make it public...Mil's a great shopping companion! *WinK*

MICHELLE'S LATEST & CURRENT ADDICTION: Sugar crakers dipped in soy milk!

BABY...We're expecting a new addition to the family some time end of this year! *Awwwwww* It's been a while since we've had baby's nappy drying on the clothes' line...Grandpopo and grandpa were already smiling from cheek to cheek upon receiving the good news and me here, down under couldn't resist the joy of the news as well. I've rushed into K-mart this arvo to get newborn bodysuits and a blankie for my soon-to-be little cousin! =)

GIANT MEATBALLS or BIG PAU STUFFING RECIPE...Okay with this gigantic meatballs recipe, they do taste similar to the stuffings of the big pau we get from back home (they obviously don't taste the same but similar). Unfortunately, I have yet to find the recipe for pau skin. So, if anyone of you have recipes for pau skin, do share it with me, ey? As of now while awaiting recipe for pau skin, you can serve the pau stuffing as giant mealballs if you like.

Ingredients to serve 4: 500g of minced veal
1 tablespoon of sesame oil
1 tablespoon of chinese white wine
1 tablespoon of soy sauce
1 dash of pepper
1 dash of mixed Italian herbs
1 pinch of salt
1 raw egg
1 chunky chopped onion
4 hard boiled eggs

1) Preheat oven to 180*C

2) Mix in all ingredients except for the 4 hard boiled eggs in a medium sized bowl

3) Wrap 1/4 of mixed ingredients around 1 hard boiled egg (repeat step 3 for all 4 eggs)

4) Bake for 25 minutes in the oven

5) Shave some mozzarella cheese on top of each meatball before serving.

Warning: The meatballs could turn out as big as the size of your fist or even bigger!

*Another recipe proven yummy by Milton, Boon, John and myself ;)

p/s: I'll post the recipe for pau skin once I've got it, meanwhile, enjoy the giant meatballs!

BANANA BREAD RECIPE...Here is a simple and proven yummy recipe for banana bread lovers!

Ingredients: 230g of plain flour
2 teaspoons of baking powder
1/2 teaspoon of salt
1/4 teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda
3 medium sized, very ripe banana, peeled
125g of sugar
75ml (if you prefer it moist) / 70ml (if you prefer it dry) of vegetable oil
2 large eggs
1 1/2 teaspoons of honey

1) -Preheat oven to 180*C
-Grease loaf pan with butter

2) Throw all ingredients into a medium sized mixing bowl, smash bananas with fork,
continue to stir until blended.

3) Scrape batter into the prepared pan, chuck it into the oven and bake for 45 minutes.

4) Set it on a rack to cool for approximately 30 minutes before serving.

*Proven yummy by Milton, Boon, John and myself! ;)

Happy baking!

Reminder to self: I will never ever have cold noodles from a Korean restaurant ever again.

MARBLES...Something different that I tried this afternoon. I put together a piece made of marbles of various sizes wrapped and knotted with two strips of maroon and cream coloured organza, with a little ribbon finishing it off. Inspired by the latest Spanish sinoritas collection!

Dear Lord, please calm my heart, help me keep my cool, have a big and brave heart and combat whatever fear that I may have which is unecessary in my life. Although this world has many different interesting things/creatures that come in different shapes and sizez, I pray you will help me grasp the idea and understand the reason for their existance. At this point of time, Lord I might not be able to appreciate these things in life but I believe with time, you will reveal their beauty to me. Help me see things the way you would with your mighty eyes, help me feel things the way you feel with your loving touch, help me hear things the way you would with your careful ears, help me understand things the way you would with your gracious heart...Lord please help me...Help me not to get goosebums whenever they are in my sight and help me not to slam or smash them whenever they freak me out! Please do help me stay away from those eight-legged friends who always and never fail to make me cringe! Help me not to always be frightened by these guys when I see them! Oh Lord...help me please!

Waaaaaaa...!! Help...Michelle is darn afraid of this creature called SPI...SPID...SPIDE...SPIDER!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaa...!!

VERGE OF GIVING UP...I'm balancing myself on one leg now at the edge of this funny thing called patience and perseverance. This is beginning to feel quite tiring, I must admit, like as if I were diseased...*sigh* Sometimes people tries to understand by being understanding, but really I don't think anyone truly understands how it feels like to be right where I'm standing right now. All the crap about self motivation, determination, enthusiasm, persistence and sanity which had once upon a time kept me going and kept me strong are just flowing out of my head bit by bit...I'm losing it, sinking myself into a deep deep hole and probably never ever gonna see this thing called "light" ever again!

RAINBOW...Ever try popping your head out the car window (children reading this, don't ever try this at home!) looking for a rainbow after a big pour on a sunny day? Well, although I don't pop my head out the car window, I'm always delighted to see rainbows around and as innocent as a child, I'd always make a big deal out of catching a rainbow on a beautiful day! Somehow even if your day ain't that beautiful, the rainbow always seems to do the trick! Anyway, here's my beautiful, colourful, rainbow choker that I've put together today. It looks all happy and cheery doesn't it?

HIS VALENTINE'S TREAT...Home made Japanese food with lots of love (and wasabi) and a handpainted acrylic painting on canvas - probably not the best painting you'll find around, but at least it's painted carefully with much patience and loving thoughts...!

MY VALENTINE'S TREAT...
Dinner at Joseph Alexander was pretty impressive! The food was thumbs up, the dessert (especially) was terrific, the service was excellent and the ambiance was perfect!

VALENTINE'S DAY...

You can tell that it's Velentine's Day...

1) When restaurants/cafes are fully booked up for the night
2) When online florists stop receiving orders for the month of February
3) When gift shops are overcrowded with people picking up cards
4) When random people on streets holding bouquet of flowers or bundles of balloons
5) When you get complimentary heart shaped chocolates
6) When you see cheery, smiley faces all day
7) When people are extra nice to each other
8) When ...
9) When ......
10) When .........

Thought: I reckon people shouldn't need to be reminded to be nice and all lovey dovey to each other only on the 14th of February each year. Everyday should be Valentine's Day!

Warning: Girls, do not get your hopes too high on this killer day...Coz the higher you get your hopes up, the more painful it gets when your "guy" decides to throw you back on earth and allow you to go through an experience of what they call..."REALITY BITES!" adventure. Having said that, there ARE guys out there who are capable of living it up to our standards, eg; I got my bunch of roses at 7:15am this morning! =)

DICEY & DARCEY...Some say dice, some say strawberries...I say Dicey and Darcey! Dicey is the choker and Darcey is the bracelet. Bold and fun combination. Wear them with a racer back/spaghetti/tube top or a simple black flare tube dress and they scream fun attention! I'd wear these two pieces to really fun places like fun fair or a happy weekend, shopping trip...but reality is that, I've specially made these two to wear to work. For those who don't already know, I'm currently filling up a casual position as a wait staff at a cafe in New Farm. Colours of the cafe are red, black and white and we as wait staff are allowed to wear a red, black or white top with black pants to work...I'd definitely not wear white, considering the chances of getting it stained...and red's not exactly my kinda colour. So, I wear black to work almost everytime (except for CNY - I wore red...yes, I'm conservative!)...Needless to say, I need some accessories to go with it as black on black isn't exactly very exciting for a person who enjoys colours like myself. Well, occasionally I do wear Toffee Apple to work...but I thought since I'd be working more days, I shouldn't bore the customers (or myself) with my same boring "uniform" everyday.

I've been working at the cafe for almost 4 weeks now...we meet different people everyday, some nice, some nasty, some polite, some rude, some smile, some sulk...but I guess it's just human that everyone is different and that everyone has different things to offer. But just a note though, treat wait staff the way you wanna be treated because these poor wait staff could turn out to be one of your friends' friends, your siblings, siblings' friends, neighbours or could even be yourself one day! We stand from the beginning of our shifts to the end with just a 15 minutes break in between 6 or 8 hours. When not standing, we're probably running on the way to catch the bell in the kitchen or behind bar cleaning or walking to serve the next customer or bending down picking up rubbish, walking around checking if everyone's ok, and the list goes on. So, it doesn't really help if you are impatient or just a spolit little brat who demands all attention for no particular reason. Treat these wait staff with a little kindness as they really do work their bums off for the cash (and not forgetting working under pressure with 5 pairs of eyes from the management following you around the cafe to make sure you do it right!) and really, not that these people are born to know how to carry couple of heavy, hot plates/drinks to serve at once. So if they accidently spill something or break something, don't stare like it's out of the world. No one's natural with tasks that they've not done before...everyone's got their first times...give that poor little girl a chance!

RIGHT PLACE, RIGHT TIME...Looking back, I've been out of Uni for approximately 4 months now...in these 4 months, I won't say I've had the best time of my life, but nonetheless, bearable and still going although it hasn't really been a bed of roses. I'm still awaiting on residency here...it's been almost 3 months and we're already at our final stages of getting it done - which is good news btw, coz I've known of friends who had taken a longer time. Well, as I've yet to be granted residency, it's not easy to get a job as employers will not wanna risk you leaving the job if anything goes wrong with your application. Thus, I've been working casual at food court and at table service cafe ever since I finished Uni and awaiting residency. Not exactly an ideal job, but at least it keeps me busy for the time being...Well at least I have something to do and some money to spend rather than sitting at home doing nothing and feeling misarable. Let's just say I've got things planned out for me pretty well, I'm happy with most things at the moment, at least I'm having something to do, something to keep me going and most of all something to look forward to.
p/s: Next step ahead is to stay focus hunting for a suitable full time job!

GONG XI FA CAI...I'd like to begin by wishing all a very happy and prosperous Chinese New Year!! May this new year of the dog brings you and your family happiness, peace, good health, good fortune and everything nice and sweet!!

Celebrations of ushering the new lunar year has been a little different for me this year. Interesting in its own ways...I was not home for reunion dinner last night, but was at work and had the chance to witness for the first time Aussie-fied lion dance and kung foo! It felt strange initially as I guess I grew up seeing typical black hair and yellow skin under the lion heads all my life that this Aussie version was somehow pretty comical to me. However, after a couple of minutes, people started cheering and there were fire crackers cracking away in its very own typical way and man, I tell you it does feel good to hear something so familiar in a foreign place! I suddenly felt I connected with the crowd and for an instant, forgot that I was working! But that was all cool as we got our jobs done and quickly got out of there.

After we left from work, Jessie and I headed to Chinatown to have our alienated "reunion dinner"...Well at least I had Jessie and Jessie had me, ahahhahahha! And coincidentally, my dearest family called from home and although it did feel a tiny bit funny that I was here when I should have been home, everything was good. Jessie and I had a good and satisfied Chinese dinner (not forgetting the Chinese New Year songs at the background). Jessie drove me home after and as we drove up Durham Street, we saw my neighbour ushering/welcoming the goddess of fortune in a very Chinesey way like how we'd do it back home. Jessie and I had a good laugh about it and was more surprised than anything else to have seen something to similar to home here.

Anyway, today is the first day of Chinese New Year...I started by going to church for weekly dosage of spiritual food before the whole lot of us headed to one of the Chinese cafes in Sunnybank plaza for lunch. Lunch was good and yummy...we had a good time together...but of course it would have been better with our families...but well, at least we have a home away from home and we enjoyed each others presence as much as we enjoyed our food. So what more can we ask for? Erm...maybe the angpows to be sent over?!?!??! ahahahhahahahahah!! Anyway, I'm already planning to go home for reunion dinner next year. Nothing beats grandma's cooking and good time with family! =)

p/s: If you didn't realize, I decorated our place with bold, RED, Chinesey decorations just to make everyone feel more at home! ;)

COSY CORNER...This is my new cosy little room...Isaac's left for good...Boon's moved in...and I've swapped rooms from upstairs to downstairs. Everything's good...I'm settling in nicely at my little corner, but still heaps of packing and unpacking waiting to be done. I like this new room...like Gwen said, "Just like living in an attic..." (but the total opposite...you gotta see it for yourself)...The only downside is that it has got no windows in the room, which could actually be of advantage to me...that way, I can sleep in without worrying about getting a toasted bum! Also because it's at the basement, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that no uninvited spiders come crawling around during summer...Spiders can really freak me out! But then again, I might consider keeping them as pets if they ever come visiting! Well, besides the windows and the univited guests, this place is great...love it!! :D

DURIAN...My favourite local fruit!! =) We've searched everywhere for durians since my arrival back in KL 2 months ago...but coz durian is a seasonal fruit, you can't get it as and when you like. These durians we had were brought back all the way from Penang by Uncle John who knows that I've been craving for these torny fruit!! =) Totally yummylicious!!

FAMILY DINNER...Our family gathered together for dinner last evening to celebrate Guo Tung which is the last event on the Chinese calander for the year. What's for dinner??...Lots and lots of yummy tasting food all prepared and cooked by the best cook ever - my grandpopo!! =) And for dessert we had homemade Tong Yuen and DURIAN!! *yummyyummm*

PLAIN WHITE FLOUR...As you can see from the picture, Aunty Tess is very hard at work preparing the flour for Tong Yuen purposes. I don't know much about preparing the flour, but I do know you'll have to add some water to make the flour stick together like a piece of dough!! Interesting, isn't it?? According to my grandpopo (she says it every year while making these balls), every year after you've eaten Tong Yuen you'll grow one year older, (erm...well, don't ask me why coz I've yet to find out!! :p) and we'll all always respond by saying, "Oh, then please put these Tong Yuen away from me!!" Ahahahhaahha!! =) p/s: It doesn't really work that way, coz we'll be forced to eat anyway!! :p

COLOURFUL FLOUR...All ready to be made into tiny little colourful balls...Tong Yuen usually comes in pink and white, but to show the world our love for colours, we've included yellow and orange as well... ;) Ahahhahaha, speaking of our love for colours, there were years where we made pink, white, green, yellow and blue too!! =)

CHAI TONG YUEN (also known as Sweet Glutinous Ball Soup)...This is an annual event at the Lee's. Every year grandpopo will call every female member of the family at home to help out with making the colourful flour into little balls before boiling them into sweet dessert. I recall as a child, I was always fascinated by the colourful flour and would asked to be given some to play with...the adults at work would usually give me a pinch of the flour that they were working on and I would make pretend cooking them in my own masak-masak set. As I approached my teens, I no longer needed to beg for flour to play with, but instead I was given permission to sit with the adults at work...hahahhahha...and ever since then, I always picked the brightest colour and had an obsession comparing sizes of the little balls!! =)

To me, this Chinese tradition is very important and it knits a family together therefore it should always be practised no matter which part of the world you live in...We, Chinese should always know where our roots come from and should be proud of our heritage. In my opinion, as Westernized as our world is becoming today, events in the Chinese calander should never be neglected because behind every event, there is always great values to it.

TONG YUEN...according to the Chinese calander, today is Guo Tung...a day where family members gather together to ensure the family's togetherness in the coming year. In the Chinese calander, Guo Tung is also the final event wrapping up the year before ushering in the new year. The reason this Chinese dessert was named Tong Yuen is because it sounds like the Chinese word for "togetherness".

MY FIRST CROCHET PROJECT...And to those who thinks I'm better with tools like screwdriver, hammer and nails...ahahhahahha, think again!! ;) Here's my first crochet project...few flowers to be attached to a bag I knitted few months back. I've always wanted to crochet but no one I knew had the knowledge (or patience) to teach me...till I finally pestered aunty Tess hard enough!! =) She went to kidnap a few sheep from the nearby kampung in order to get me some yarn to learn, ahahhahahha, and melted some metal for the crochet needle, ahahahahahhah!! And so here it is...my first ever crochet project!! =) And to those who think I can' t do such girlie stuff...ahahhahah, proven you wrong, haven't I?? =)

CHING CHING...After a long long time...Here's an anklet I've put together...with a pretty hand-painted center piece and glass beads accompanying it...all nicely and neatly tied together to a brown nylon cord. This is a very casual, ragged yet chinese looking piece...I'd wear it everyday!! =)

SHOPPING FRIDAY...Here is another pair of shoes I got today while shopping with Mommy. Ahahhahaha, just as I reminded myself that I should really stop buying more shoes, I got myself another pair!! Ahahhahahha!! Okay, what else did I get besides shoes?? I also got some clothes in preparation for the roaring working world!! Ahahhahaha, speaking of which, I haven't even gone for a single interview but I've started worrying about what to wear when I join the work force!! So far I've got 2 skirts, 4 shirts, 5 knit wear tops, 4 pairs of pants...Hmmm, now no wonder my Daddy says I fall under the "high maintenance" category!! Hahahhahahah!! Haih...actually, I'm really praying that I get a job soon!! Don't really wanna go back to Brissy with nothing to look forward to...And definitely not the casual food court job anymore...it's time to move on from there...

MY BEADING TOOLS...Here it is...my birthday present from Geri, Dick, Dom, Jing Hui and Siow BenBen!! =) You guys have been awesome...I can't believe you guys are gonna leave me in Brissy and head home so soon!! Whatever it is, you guys are the BEST neighbours ever!! *Certified best neighbours!!* ;) Be sure to keep in touch!! =)

BIRTHDAY DINNER...A (belated) Birthday dinner at Monte's with my parents, Alison and WeiJin...I'm officially 22...!! After 2 cakes, wishes, gifts and love from everyone...I'm a very happy 22 year old!! =)

BEADING TOOLS...I also received a set of professional beading tools via snail mail from Geri, Dick, Jing Hui, Ben Ben and Dom, all the way from Spore...the set came in purple, my favourite colour!! Thanks guys!! I really do appreciate it...!! I will try to come up with more creative ideas...now that I have professional tools, I feel even more motivated than ever!! =)

BIRTHDAY PRESENTS...Purple card from Alison, Pink card from Mommy and Daddy, Watch from Aunty Tess, Angpows from PoPo and KungKung and Mommy and Daddy, Pendent from Uncle Jimmy, Purse from Munn (Thanks Munn, really touched by your sweet gesture!!), Calvin Klien Truth from Mommy, iPoddy from John...Thanks you guys!! =)

GRANDPARENTS...Big AngPow for a BIG GIRL!! Ahahahhahaha!! Thanks PoPo and KungKung!!

SURPRISE...After dinner at Grandpopo's kitchen (curry chicken was for dinner that night...yummyyyyyy!! But didn't do any good for the throat though...nevertheless...yummy!!) I was surprised as Mommy carried a cake out from the kitchen!! *I love surprises!!* ;) No wonder Mommy kept calling and hurrying us back for dinner...now I know...everyone was waiting for the birthday girl!! The yummy chocolate cake was from Aunty Tess...she also got me a Guess? watch too(ha...a new watch for me to start my new 22nd!!)...Thanks Aunty Tess!! ;)

MOMMY'S OFFICE...after lunch we sent Mommy back to work before Alison and I made our way to Times Square.

BIRTHDAY TREAT...Alison treated me to Karaoke session at Neway, Times Square after lunch with my Queen!! ;) We for nearly 4 hours non stop...and as a result?? Sore throat, ahahahhahah!!

BIRTHDAY LUNCH...with 2 very much loved people...Mommy and Alison...enjoying lunch on my special day at the Shangri-La Hotel...

16th NOV...Today I'm officially 22 years and 1 month old...This day one month ago Alison came arriving with a cake at my door step!! =) And at 12 am, she insisted that we cut the cake!! Well, well, what can I say but to express my appreciation to such a great and wonderful friend that I truly treasure!! Actually, the fact that I was able to celebrate my birthday with my family and friends back at home this year was already a good enough gift for me, as for the last 3 years, I have been celebrating my birthday away from home and for most years in the examination hall even!! Thanks to dearest Mommy and Daddy who have shared their love with me all these years...The greatest lesson I've learnt from being lived here for 22 years is to always appreciate our parents for all the sacrifices that they've made for us...I'll never be able to repay every penny and effort spent on me, but the least I can do is to appreciate them and to fulfill my duty as their dear daughter till the very end. I'd also like to thank Jhane, Tse Jea, Wei Jin, Jessie, Ming Kit, Geri, Dick, Jing Hui, Siow Ben Ben, Dom, Vania, Yin Teng, BeeV, Wye, Aaron, Renee, Anita, Belinda, Munn and (especially) John who have sent me birthday wishes/gifts via phone calls, sms, emails, snail mails, msn, friendster, etc...You guys rock!! =)

PONGGY...fractured his arm and broke his leg...(what about bak kut teh with Ponggy?? Muahahhahah!!)

PONGGY...caught the cold and not so well... =(

PONGGY...well, fine and smiling!! =)

STAR CHASE...Presenting to you...Miss Hongkong 1999, Sonija Kwok, 2nd runner up...Myolie Wu, TVB actors, Ron Ng and Raymond Lam...*clap* *clap* Yes, Karen was dragged by me to relive our kiddo days on the 2nd Dec 05 by joining a multitude of TVB fans at Times Square to catch a glimpse of these TVB stars! My favourite among the lot?? Sonija Kwok!! =) She's really gorgeous real life...she's sweet, graceful, lady like and carries herself with poise. Okay, so much about the stars...!! Let me tell you how these fans go really crazy upon their arrival!! I was pushed left and right, front and back and nearly suffocated from each others' perspiration!! So, now you ask will I do this again?!?!? Erm...I think I'll have to think twice before going next time!! Plus while waiting for them to arrive, in the midst of pushing and wobbling among the crowd, my poor camera had a great fall and no it didn't break it's crown but the edges of the poor cammy were gone...*a moment of silence for poor cammy* =( It wasn't all that bad actually...at least Karen and I had fun that evening!! ;)

SHOES...Whoever came up with the statement, "women can never have enough of shoes"...you're right!! This week alone, Karen (my uncle's girlfriend) and I have been roaming shoe shops around KL and have been feeding our feet with pretty pretty shoes!! =)

CARWASH...This evening I was at my grandpa's, washing my filthy bird shit covered car!! While I was washing, my grandpa came back from his daily jog and offered me a hand...Knowing me, I can be quite good at giving my car a good bath, but whatever that can be done in 1/2 an hour, if I were to do it alone, it'll take me one whole hour to finish. I must admit I have a great grandpa who's a very handy man around our household!! Whatever problems, anything broken, something torn, just give my grandpa a call and it'll be done as new for you!! This evening while we were washing my car, I realised another something of my grandpa...he's not only great handy man but he's also very friendly around the neighbourhood!! =) While busy scrubbing bird shit off every corner of my car, this makcik who was walking pass greeted us, I smiled at her and my garndpa exchanged greetings with her...after she walked quite a distance, my grandpa begin to explain, where she works and was telling me she's a cleaner in some shopping mall around KL and that she lives in the kampung and need to walk quite a distance home everyday. SHortly after this makcik walked off our sight, another uncle came strolling by, and after the usual excahnging of greetings, my grandpa begin to unfold his background to me telling me he's a retired doctor and his daughter is also a doctor in some hospital and telling me exactly which house he lives in. Oh, well...what can I say about my grandpa?? Since young, he's been very helpful and to me a very kind man...I wish we youngsters can learn to be as friendly, without being so judgemental towards people we meet just like my grandpa, then this world would definitely be a better place to live in!! ;)

GENTING...My family and I went to Genting Highlands yesterday for a one day get-away from KL!! Our main purpose there was actually to watch the finalists compete for the National Lion Dance 2005 championship...little did I know I have such keen interest!! I really admire those guys' team work and coordination while sqatting under the lion head, nearly blind-folded but still can perform such breathtaking stunts on those 5-7 feet tall poles!! But each time one of them fall off the poles, my heart sank as I can imagine the pain and the disappointment!! Man, they were really good and I was really impressed!! =)
During lunch break, Alison and WeiJin came to join us...when the show ended, we went to the theme park and took a ride on one of those mini indoor roller coasters. After which we headed to Coffee Bean for some fresh air...I think we spent quite a few hours there, coz when we arrived our sunnies were on, but when we left, we were counting stars!! Oh well, what do you expect, we had so much to catch up on and weijin went to the toilet for like 4 times?!?!? We really enjoyed each others' company and I was secretly wishing they didn't have to go to work today so that we can have more time to hang out!!

p/s: My mommy's on medical leave for 2 days!! I wonder if she's really sick or she told the doctor her daughter's back?!?!?! ahahahahaha!! Whichever la...as long as it benefits the both of us!! ;)

HOME SWEET HOME...I'm back in KL and I'm loving it!! =) So far, I've gone to Melacca, had char kuey tiaw, nasi lemak, salted fish fried rice, beef ball noodles, chicken rice, pan mee, roti canai, Maggi goreng, mee goreng, and the most impressive of the lot...my grandpopo's home-cooked food!! Yummyz!!

DISCHARGED...John's finally home after spending 3 whole days and 2 lonely nights at the emergency department of the Royal Brisbane Hospital. Well, he's been diagnosed with Bell's Palsy, but what caused it is still a mystery to all of us who are still quite eager to find out. Whatever it is, John and I would like to extend our sincere appreciation and million thanks to all who prayed/cared/concerned/called/sms-ed/dropped by/accompanied...in big or small ways you've all been really supportive and encouraging to John and he really appreciates every little bit of your care and concern =)

p/s: Special thanks to Chef Alvin and Dr Boon ;p!!

ROYAL BRISBANE HOSPITAL...That was where we had our adventure for the day!! John went to see a doctor in Toowong this afternoon after realising that the aching on his scalp and neck has swelled up the area behind his ear and also affected his facial muscles on his left side. The gp at Toowong diagnosed John with Bell's palsy but can't be certain as the symptoms that John showed were pretty confusing but suggesting a borderline Bell's palsy and so she referred him to RBH emergency department for further investigation. Upon receiving the news, Alvin called and Alvin as always, a great friend with the kindest of all hearts, demanded that we wait for him as he takes time off work to send us to the hospital. At the hospital, four doctors came to examine John along with a CT scan and an mRI scan were done. After 9 1/2 hours of medical jargons and in the emergency ward witnessing many patients being pushed in and out of the room, the final neurologist for the night came at 12am to give us the report of the mRI scan and advised that John be admitted as the head of the neurology department would like to personally examine John tomorrow morning...and so, being a good patient, John agreed and the procedures were then done for him to get admitted. And so now, as the thunder and lightning blow outside my room window, John is all by himself in the hospital, emergency department. I personally have mixed feelings about this whole thing that happened just today...one part of me feels relief that the scans didn't show anything significant, but the other part of me feels really painful to see John's 1/2 smiling face whenever he attempts to smile...I also feel sad...sad that I can't be there with him right now and as I tried to make arrangements to take a day off work tomorrow, it seems to have gone in vain as well...*sigh* I can only pray and pray that God will still John's heart and put him away from whatever that could be threatening to him.

MONOTONOUS LIFE...I guess my life has been so monotonous lately that every little thing excites me!! So is that good or bad?? A little bit of both I guess...I was ecstatic when Tamelyn (my migration agent) told me that I've been granted a Temporary Graduate Visa which allows me permission leave and enter Australia as and when I like till the 6th January 2006...First thing that came to mind was, "I'm going homeeeeeeeeeee!!" followed by a great rapture of excitement from the inside, spilling all the joy and bliss of the thought of home...being with my family on my birthday this year, going on a family trip to a nearby getaway for the Raya holidays, savouring every mouth of grandpopo's homecooked food, driving around KL in my off white old moving car, waking up on the most comfortable bed ever, having my hair done at Guys and Chics everyday, opening the fridge to bottles of purple vitagen!! Woo-hooo...so much fun at home!! =) Then hours later after I left Tamelyn's office, sitting on one of those benches in the city reading one of my favourite books, I received a call from a cheerful voice saying, "Hi, I'm calling from the Department of Child Safety, may I speak with Michelle, please??" Another episode of excitement burst in me but this time a little different as it came along with a slight fear gripping my heart as I stilled my eyes into space...I was anticipating that the department had called for an interview appointment or to simply reject this unsuitable applicant!! To my surpise they called to inform me that I should not expect to hear from them anytime soon because this is a huge process and it takes a while for them to clear and shortlist the applicants!! Well...fair enough...let's wait and see!! Just that one phone call and the good news from Tamelyn, my day in the city came to an end as I strolled to the bus stop, ride on a bus and headed home... =)

p/s: I guess when you've been knocked down so many times in a row, once it stops, you just can't help but feel way too good!! Muahahhahahahhah!!

AS REQUESTED by Miss Seah, pictures taken on Mid-Autumn festival celebration '05 have been uploaded on my multiply site...http://hiswarriorprincess.multiply.com =)

FOODCOURT SURGEON...Yes, that's exactly what I am...on-call 24-7!! I received a call at 4pm asking me to go to work...well, I could jolly well reject and save up on all the whining...but the thing is, my hours were cut again this week, making me left with lesser hours than usual...so being me, I'd grab every opportunity to make up for the loss hours...coz I have my own budget and my own plans in hand, and I just can't afford to have working hours which fluctuate so crazily!! So yes, I went to work anyway, got my butt there from the city 1/2 and hour after I got the call. And today was no different from a typical late night shopping Thursday...people were flooding the foodcourt for food...and according to Eileen and Junwei who dropped by to give me a smile (thanks guys!!) said I looked a bit sien and tired...ahahhahahha, kinda expected, that's why seldom greet a familiar face while at work, knowing how bad I'd look, hehehehehhe...but then again, Ashley never fails to stop by everytime she's around the foodcourt, thanks Ashley, I appreciate it!! =)

Okay, can anyone guess what kept me busy last night?? It was another plain, usual, boring day after work yesterday...I missed the 5:30 bus, I had to go by Toowong and transfer to a 412. The traffic was so busy that I stood at the traffic lights waiting for the lights to change and by the time it did, I was just in time to wave good bye to my dearest 412!! And so I had to wait for another good 20 mins before the next bus came. Arrived home at round 6:30pm...John popped by the door returning from work at around about the same time. Then he excitedly hurried me to his room telling me he has something to show me. I went down to his room, everything else looked the same to me except for the 2 boxes sitting on his study!! *cheng* *cheng* *cheng* Ipod Nano's in the house!! *Yay!!* I couldn't wait to ripp the boxes open and there they were, a white Nano and a black...initially I said I'd go for the black, but after seeing the white one, I fell for it...so the white one was it...I'm the proud owner of the white Nano!! =) And that was my first birthday present accompanying me into my 22nd birthday which is coming up in one month's time!! Thanks John!! =) I really do appreciate such a cool gift!! While on the bus to work this evening, I just couldn't resist smiling at myself as I held the Nano and thought to myself, "This is it...my most precious gift, my possession right here, in my bag..." Thanks John!! =) And btw, I slept with it right by my side last night, and I think I must have dreamt that I was on the mountain top with my Nano!! =)

So much about Miss Nano...Anyone remembers Miss Alison?? Yes, my dear dear friend and I miss her so...!! She's finally got her Internet connection up and running at her new place!! We haven't had a good chat for ages now...but the amazing thing was...it felt just as good as ages ago...or even better!! And we just continued where we left the last time!! And that could only be beacuse she's my best friend, and because we're best of friends, there's no need for reminders or warnings about how special we are to each other!! It felt soooooooooooo good after a breif chat with her...just like one of those night where we'd be lying on my bed chatting till one of us shuts the other up, ahahahhahahha!! Love you sista!! =)

CATCH-UP-TUESDAY...Today is a catch up day because 1) I finally got to catch up with all the sleep I've been dying for and, 2) I caught up with Munn whom I've not spent much time with for agessssss!!

Sleep was good...I haven't had the chance to sleep in for quite some time now. Last night I made it a point to tire myself out and told myself that I'd at least stay in bed till mid day today...and so I did!! I slept till around 11am before I finally caught a glimpse of sun light bursting through my bedroom window from the corner of my eyes...then I thought to myself, "It's about time to wake up, Miss sleepy head!!", But Miss sleepy head knowing how sleepy and tired she was couldn't care less to respond...continued her journey into dreamland...then at round about 11:30am, someting in me just sprung me up!! I opened my eyes, reached out for my laptop which was underneath my bed, sat it on my bed, turned it on and wacthed one episode of funny Scrubs before I dozed off at the end of it again...!! Finally at 12:20pm, I was woken up by my noisy hungry factory and so that was when I left my bed in search of food from the kitchen!!

After my breaky + lunchie = branchie??, I headed for the shower before I took a bus to meet up with Mr Mohawk at Indooroopilly Shopping Centre as planned last night. I was really looking forward to it coz I really didn't wanna spend my off day at home doing nothing. So meeting up with Munn was a great idea...besides, he's gonna be graduating and returning home to Singapore by the end of this year and I realised I haven't been spending much time with him lately. Anyway, we met up, chat over a purplish-looking blueberry cheese cake and coffee, shopped a bit...killed some time at K-mart, had Maccas for dinner, went back to his place for a movie which his housemate, Shufen was half way watching...before we called it a day!! Spent a good 7 hours with Munn...something in me told me that I think I'm gonna really miss this guy when he leaves for home. He's sincere, easy-going, up-front and daring (well, the new hairstyle says it all!!), with an attitude that doesn't really care much about things but yet he's sensitive to people around him. Aha, how complicated is Munn?!?!? Ahahahahahha!! He's a great guy...well at least a great brother for sure coz he got Bonds undies for his sister while shopping today!! Thanks for a great time with you today Munn!! I would gladly do it again!! =)

p/s: Jessie's PR was finally approved after a long 6 1/2 months wait...congratulations!! Now is time for serious business!! ehehheeheh!!

MY FIRST EVER...Yes, I've finally submitted my first ever job application for a full time / permanent job today with the help of John my angel of the day!! *Clap, clap* He delivered the application to the department on my behalf...I really wanted to do it myself considering it's my first ever but...I had to work and I couldn't get time off coz 1) my boss doesn't like us taking off as and when we like and, 2) my hours have been cut this week coz some person is in desperate need of money to pay for an air ticket to visit his gf who is right in the other part of the world, which resulted in less hours for me and more hours for him!! Jerry, you owe me BIG time!! Yups, so John had to help me make copies and deliver them to the Human Resourse Branch of the department which was located on George Street in the city.

Okay just in case you think I'm such a relaxed and calm person...think again!! Coz I spent the whole of last night till this morning, around 3:30am tidying up and doing research on questions in the selection criteria. It's not that I'm anal...well, I can be quite anal at times, but it's just that this whole thing seems to be such an interesting and exciting highlight of my life at the current moment (well, think about it, these days my life revolves around the stinking smacking foodcourt and foodcourt alone!!) This seeking employment thingy is like organizing one of those huge concerts for one of those huge stars where nothing can possibly go wrong, coz I want and need everything to be 10 out of 10!! =) And because my whole episode of nothing-can-go-wrong-in-my-selection-criteria which kept me up till wee hours in the morning, guess who woke up to greet me this morning?? Ahahhahaha...yes...Miss Cranky Pants!! I wore a pair of Panda eyes to work, my brain felt like it was somehow detached from my mind and my body left to float on its own without having nerves and muscles to control it!! How exaggerated is that?!?!? But I really did feel that way!! Like I wasn't thinking straight, wasn't acting right, wasn't talking sense!! And to add to that I had around 20 over orders of NASI GORENG!! Which btw, in case you didn't know, NASI GORENG is one of the most troublesome food to cook in the menu and we always secretly pray that no one would order that or we'd kill that person!! So, yes, today Michelle wore her cranky pants to work, her brain was detached from her mind and her body floating everywhere...so it makes complete sense that she probably forgot to pray for no orders on NASI GORENG!!

Anyhow...I do pray that I would at least be shortlisted for an interview?? Well, He knows the plans He has for me which are plans for good and not disaster, to give me a hope and a future. When I pray, He will listen...If I look for Him in earnest, I will find Him when I seek Him!! =) So God, do Your thing!! The red carpet is all ready for You!! =)

SUNDAY...Went for spiritual breakfast this morning (Thanks Mil, for the ride...I totally love your very retro-looking Beeeemer...your 1/2 convertible Beeeemer...she's gorgeous!!), then off to lunch at Mayfair with Mil, Boon (who is finally back from his rural attachment...I was just thinking about him yesterday, and he turned up today...woah...deja vu?!?!?), Sarah (Mil's American friend, who puts me to shame with her fluent spoken and written Chinese!!) and John. After which we dropped by JB hi-fi and then to Indooroopilly Shopping Centre coz Mil needs to pick up a few pair of shorts since spring/summer is here and he's soaking in his jeans...Well he didn't just get his shorts, he was contemplating on a pair of slippers...and in the end?? Mil couldn't resists the pair of Aqua Havaianas and he went straight to the counter and paid for it after seeing John with a pair of new white Havaianas, muahhahahahhaha!! And me?? I was at my best behaviour today!! Not a single cent spent at City Beach (although I was thinking of a pair of bikini...but in the end...nope!!), *woohoo!!* Seems like the self-control thing is really working in me today!!

The second half of my day was spent enjoying my 50 cents soft served cone from Maccas in Alvin's car, a good 2 1/2 hours nap (which I've been longing for agessssssss), a cold cut orange to wake me up, a good chat with my parents online, a quick chat with Geri (btw Geri, you have to stay strong...don't let whatever you're going through affect you too much...well although it's hard not to...you try...life should be lived in abundance and you've been greatly blessed...continue to rise and be the best you can be, k...I'm here if you need a listening ear!!), tidying up my selection criteria that's due tomorrow and finally, blogarism in progress!!

My thoughts: Wouldn't it be nice to put on my graduation gown (once again) and have a few pictures taken along College Road, surrounded by blooming purple Jacaranda trees?? Afterall those trees will be fondly remembered by all UQ students as an alert warning that final exams are just around the corner!! ;p

Current state of mind: I want that job!! Give it to me!!

iPod NANO...Black or white?? The black model looks really sleek and elegant while the white has a clean and futuristic look, in a way maintaining its originality. *Dilemma* Somehow I think the black appeals more to me than the white...But review has it that the black model scratches more easily than the white...!! Arghhhhhhh!! Why must they give us choices to choose from?? Although it's just from 2 different colours, it's enough to kill quite a few cells in the brain, I reckon!! So, black or white?? I have a feeling I'd go with black in the end...coz it goes really well with the black stylish PSP!! Btw, PSP ROCKS!! Now I know why my cousins were so glued to it when they were here...Even the giant 21 yr old kid can't get her hands off it!! *sly smile*

SELECTION CRITERIA in progress... I'm in the midst of responding to a selection criteria for a job application. I'm trying for the position of a Child Safety Officer. It sounds like an interesting and challenging job...well, I bet it is!! Just the way I'd like it!! I'm quite hopeless in office, routine-based, 9 - 5 jobs...I don't know why...maybe coz I'm an easily bored person?? Not exactly my cup of tea to sit in the comfort of an office from morning to evening, doing the same thing over and over again. Anyway back to the job...it was recommended by Lung. He's been so helpful, I guess I must really buy him dinner or something...He's sat down with me to go through the questions from the selection criteria and has given me lots of helpful hints and tips. He's also explained the nature of this job to me and has given me lots of encourgament and support. Thanks Lung, you've taught me so much and I really do appreciate it!! Well, another person who has been really helpful is Alvin. Today I took a peek into his final hour at work on a Friday afternoon!! I took a train to Darra, and Alvin picked me up from the train station...from there we went to a local pharmacy where he had to close their account or pass them something or something like that...and so I tagged along...after which we went to the bank where he had to drop off some stuff. Then from there we headed back to Alvin's office where I had my documents certified by his company's director who is also a JP. Thank goodness for Alvin's help that I managed to get my documents certified by today...or else I probably wouldn't be able to make it for the deadline on Monday!! *Phew* Thanks Alvin...as I mentioned on MSN, I owe you BIG time...taro bubble tea??

Okay, let you in to my little secret...I still can't believe myself that I'm currently SEEKING EMPLOYMENT!! Hmmm, *scratch head*...wasn't I in Uni just yesterday?? Doing the usual things of a typical Uni student?? Time flies...and that is a fact that I can never get over with!! Whatever it is...I'll just have to sink into reality and remind myself that I'll in 22 in approximately a month's time...so seeking employment is an absolutely normal thing and I should be very excited by it...wait a minute, did I not mention that I AM indeed quite excited about it?? About the whole employment thingy?? It is exciting...like a whole new phase in life!!

**Current addiction: Grey's Anatomy...I so can't wait for the 3rd episode of the 2nd season!! Will someone please soothe my addiction?!?!??!**

18+ CARD...License to unlimitted alcohol and partying??!?!? Well, I finally have my proof of age card after being here for close to 3 years!! Why do I even need one out of a sudden after being comfortable without one for 3 years?? Coz I didn't know even kareoke needs proof of age ID!! Without it, they would put you in an "UNDER AGE" room!! How ridiculous is that?? And btw, this lousy looking card cost me AUD$21.75!! But *yay* I've got license to unlimitted alcohol!! ;p

SUPRE`...Muahhahahahhahah!! I can't believe myself, I went for the group interview!! I thought everyone who was interested could just show up...but aparently not!! Only those who were shortlisted were invited for the interview!! That was a bit of a esteem-booster statement!! ANyway, I was a bit nervous at first as I don't know what to expect from a group interview coz I've not been invited for any sort of group interview before!! Lung said they could give us math sums to do and also ask us heaps of question to see who shouts the loudest "ME, ME, ME, ME, ME!!" Alriteeee, Lung was 1/2 correct!! There was no math sums involved but they did ask quite a few questions!! Firstly, the "Hi, my name is Michelle...ta da ta da ta da..." part, then they asked us to go around the shop, pick out an outfit that we would wear if we were to work there and why!! That part was pretty easy...I picked out a colourful flare, dressy top to go with a white skinny leg...why?? Coz it's colourful and happy and easy going and bla bla bla!! Then 3rd question was the classic "why do you wanna work in Supre`??" Well, it's all about saying every good thing about Supre` (obviously)!!

After the whole thing, I just walked out and wondered for a while..."Hmmm, people here are rather interesting??" From what they say it's a lot of fun but definitely a lot of hard work too...c'mon, Supre` is sooooooooooo packed on late night shopping days and weekends!! Face the fact, most Supre` girls wear a black face 1/2 way through the day anyway!! Okay back to the interesting people...the manager asked me, "So tell us a little about yourself..." and I replied, "Hi, my name is Michelle, I'm 21 yrs old..." Then I asked, "What else do you wanna know about me??" She just looked at me, smiled and then continued..."What about clubbing?? Partying?? Do you do any of those?? What do you do on a weekend?? Party with your friends?? Tell us...let us know more about you!!" And I just quickly and briefly thought to myself, "You mean how much I club and party defines who I am and my chances of getting a job here?? That's weird!!" Anyway, I just thought I'd go with the flow and so I babbled, "Oh, yes...clubbing of course, so love it...drinking with my friends all the time, hanging out...partying...yes!!" LIKE AS IF!! Muahahhahahhahahah!! *Biggest lie told* Well, I'm not saying anything wrong with partying and clubbing, in fact I do enjoy clubbing and partying although obviously I don't go every weekend...but isn't it a bit bimbotic to let those things define who we are?? Moreover all the other 10 who were there, all sooooooooo love partying, clubbing, alcohol, etc etc etc, like their lives revolve around partying and clubbing and alcohol alone...like without those they so can't survive!! That was really something to laugh about...I wonder if they were all like me, trying to just go with the flow, out to impress the missy manager since she was soooooooooo enlightened when she mentioned the words PARTYING and CLUBBING!! Muahhahahahhaah!! I guess that's probably why it's said to be so much fun working there...coz their culture is to PARTY and CLUB whenever they are not at work. Maybe I should give that a try and see how big a hole would my pocket be burnt!! Ahahahhahahha, and not to mention I was the OLDEST among them all!! *sad* There were 4 who were 15 (omigawd, sooooooooooooo young!!), some 16, some 19, 2 who were 21 and I am 22 this year!! Oh no!!

Anyway, if I get the job, good...new environment, new people, new job, new image?!?!? But if I don't, I don't really care...coz I really just wanted to go to give myself a shot at group interviews...now I've tried that and done that, it's not too bad...I'd say, better group interview than one-to-one interview!! =)

SHOPPING...Let's see what we've got fresh out of the shopping bag this weekend!! *Drumroll* We've got...a pair of black skinny jeans (yay!!...finally!!), a golden plaited belt and a black 'Emily The Strange' zip up cardigan. Shopping this afternoon was merely out of boredom and stress...Despite being quite broke, I know I should have just gone home after church instead of roaming round the city and pretty quite sure I'd end up spending.

Why bored?? Because it's the weekend, and there's nothing much to do other than thinking of how my weekend will just end in just a few hours and that tomorrow will be back to torturous past time at the food court again...I just refuse to call that work, because I guess my perspective of work is simply not standing behind the counter serving fussy hungry customers, cooking yucky inedible food, cleaning, scrubbing, smiling, chopping, frying, cutting bla bla bla...I'm sure most of you have heard enough of my whining on my job, so I will spare you!! I really want to and need to get a full-time job asap before I turn into one of those at the food court working fulltime and having...ish, cut things short, my past time place, which is the food court is really not very conducive for any sort of productivity at all. So that explains why I really need something more than a job at the foodcourt!!

Why stressed?? Because it's 2nd of October and it's my Daddy's birthday!! Being Daddy's girl, this is my 3rd year away from home and not able to celebrate any sort of family birthdays / functions / etc with my family!! I really do miss home!! =( Think about all the comfort I get back home?? Living under Daddy's roof?? Well, to begin with, the thought of not needing to think about where to dig out money to pay for the next rent (which is tomorrow btw!!)!! Sometimes being a grown up is not that fun afterall...*sigh*

Things happen from time to time...But well, being human it's part of the deal that comes with it I guess...always be prepared to expect the unexpected?? The reality of being human is that people do and will let us down...it is annoying, but as I've said, it's part of the deal of being human...we live through hurts and disappointments and hopefully out of it we'll grow to be stronger and be more appreciative of things around us. I don't blame anyone when things happen, it's just part it the deal...it's just that because we're humans, we do have feelings?? And the feelings part, is really quite hard to control...it comes unannounced...it stays for a while...it makes your mind go wild...it knocks you down...it picks you up, and the hopefully after that you'll be able to move on...Oh well, it's just feelings afterall!! Everyone has it, everyone goes through it...no big deal...!!

It is at times like that when you feel so vulnerable and so distracted you wish you could just fly away somewhere...Somewhere where the skies are always clear, the sun is always bright and the rainbow is out everyday!! *Sigh* Don't get me wrong, I'm not like in some kinda major depression or something...I'm just having lots of mixed feelings from a lot of things that is happening simultaneously in my life. Despite all these...little mercies still do happen...John bought me the Emily cardigan *wink*...Thanks dear!! (With the current state of my bank account, it's really quite daring of me to even think about shopping!!) ;) and just 20 minutes ago, he popped into my room and gave me a CD he's composed specially for me...that's very sweet of him, thanks so much!! I really do apprecite it!! Just when I think everything around me seems so strange, so messy, so gloomy and so tough, little mercies still happen...and people still do care (thanks Eileen, for the email and your support!! To Alvin, I appreciate you always bringing us out to dinner at my favourite place and I just simply enjoy your company!! Lung, you've got me excited and encouraged about the job you say you'd help me get, thanks!! To Nelson, thanks for the words of wisdom!!)...the sun will still shine tomorrow...and I will continue to run this race!!

p/s: Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to DADDY MY HERO
Happy Birthday to you!!
I love you and I will always do!! =)

HEY JUDE

Hey Jude, don't make it bad
Take a sad song and make it better
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better

Hey Jude, don't be afraid
You were meant to go out and get her
The minute you let her under your skin
Then you begin to make it better

And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain
Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
Well don't you know it's a food who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder

Hey Jude! Don't let her down
You have found her, now go and get her
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better

So let it out and let it in, hey Jude, begin
You're waiting for someone to perform with
And don't you know that it's just you, hey Jude
You'll do the movement you need is on your shoulder

Hey Jude, don't make it bad
Take a sad song and make it better
Remember to let her under your skin
Then you begin to make it better

(Written by: Lennon / McCartney)

WHICH PLAYGROUND ARE YOU PLAYING ON?? *Wondering* Which playground am I playing on?!?!? Okay, it's 12:30am, I'm still awake!! I'm suppose to be in bed by now, but obviously I'm still up and so don't feel like sleeping!! Just when I thought things are beginning to work out well, someone just has to poke an itchy finger in and make things bad...why?? I really, seriously wonder why...I'm so sick of this whole thing!! Call it a game if you want to!! I'm sick, I'm tired and I don't feel like playing anymore!! I wanna quit!! This is enough!! I hate to always have to worry, think and pretend!! You wanna know how I'm feeling?? Great, I'll let you in to how I'm really feeling...I feel like shit!! I feel useless, my heart is broken...feels like someone has just ripped it apart, I feel helpless, I feel insecure, I feel lousy, I feel...oh well, I just don't feel a thing anymore, how about that?!?! Everytime just when I'm ready to regain confidence and when I think I'm ready to move on, surprises shoot up!! Something has to come along to grab my heart, sink it, stab it and then drag me into a tunnel of darkness and throw me into the deep deep ocean where I'd feel lost, fearful, scared, anxious, hopeless and heartbroken. Why do I even have feelings?? Does anyone care about my feelings?? I hate to think of what to think about when things happen!! It numbs me...it scares me...it affects me!! So now tell me, does this game allow for changing players?? Pick someone else, why pick me?!?!? I wanna QUIT, now leave me alone!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TONY!! Life...Life is like a playground...you play hard and you fall hard, you pick yourself up and you play again...fall, and up and play again...it goes on and on and on till one day you're sick of this playground, you'll just knock off!! Last night a group of us got together to celebrate Tony's (my ex-(Payne Street)housemate) 22nd birthday. As I was sitting there just looking at each of us a thought crossed my mind...each of us, from different backgrounds, different walks of life, different mentality, different needs, different wants, different desires, different perspectives...haih...very different in so many ways, but yet ironically so alike in so many ways as well!! Each has different stories to tell, different things happening in their lives, different pace of life...!! I only meet these guys probably at most twice or three times each year for a get together to celebrate birthdays, etc., but yet everytime we get together, everyone is in a different phase of life...As I observed through conversations and talks, we're all playing different scenes in different playgrounds. Some played on the same field before, some stopped by but didn't quite like it, some never even been to where others have gone before...somehow couple of times a year we'll all meet in this particular playground and revisit where we left the last time. Some would continue to climb the monkey bar, some just slide down the spiral slide, some just sit and watch, some waiting for their turns...but whatever it is, what's important is that which ever playground you're playing on, play with respect, confidence and pride...do not lose yourself in your own playground. Hold on to your own beliefs, never let anyone let you down...if you fall, pick yourself up and try again!! If it doesn't work, hop on to another playground...!! Life's a playground itself...Love it!!

AS INNOCENT AS A CHILD...John always does things that amuses me...!! This morning he caught my attention for the one zillionth time!! John woke up rather early this morning, cooked himself something to eat from the kitchen, after which he headed for the wooden door and kept it open, held a text book in his hand, hoping that I'd buy into the idea that he's really studying...every vehicle that passes by caught his attention, more so if it were a bike. He poked his head out each time he heard passerby passing by. And not to mention the countless times he ran out to check on the letter box today. For a minute, as I was watching him, I thought to myself, "what is he up to?!?!?!" Then it came to mind that he's waiting on a parcel from Melbourne that he bought from online!! *Sigh* John never fails to make me laugh at his child-like-ness!! He's like this little boy waiting so eagerly for a new toy to be sent to him that he wouldn't even sit 1 metre away from the door and wouldn't allow the door to shut just so that he doesn't miss mr postman when he delivers his parcel!! He's truly like a little boy trapped in a body of a 25!! Anyway, after such a long wait, he finally shut the door closed as the clock struck 5pm...coz he knows that mr postman had probably already gone home and that he has to wait for yet another day!! So, tomorrow, I hope his parcel arrives...if not he will be a disappointed little boy (yet again!!)...It just funny how we sometimes put on our little kiddo pants and behave in such child-like manner...I guess without us realising it makes it innocent too!! =)

JOHN and CHELLE at RIVERFIRE 2005!! Was so much fun seeing the sky lit up with beautiful glitters and sparkles and colours!!

RIVER FIRE 2005 (I'm absolutely clueless when it comes to computer stuff which explains why I don't have a clue as to why the picture didn't load where I wanted it to!!)

RIVER FIRE 2005 on 3rd September...great fireworks dancing from buildings, bridges and river of Brisbane. A colourful 30minutes presentation of stardust raining from the skies with cool music accompanying it!! If only we get raining stardust every other day...ehehheheh!! That would be sooooooooo totally cool!! =)

MY GRADUATION DAY...Finally!! *phew* I finally did it on the 22nd July 2005!! My beloved family flew from KL and HongKong to join me here in Brissy for my special occasion!! It was such a top of the world feeling to finally wear the graduation gown and especially to have my family by my side cheering me on as I walk across the stage to receive my award!! =) Also a special thanks to everyone who came to cheer me on!! ;)

CLASSY QUEEN...Made up of 8mm glass frosted white beads, 6mm purple glass faceted beads and tiny clear tube beads. This piece spells elegance...very classy and pretty!! The flower can be worn either in the center of off center depending on your own preferance. This peice has been made ages ago...but it's just that I couldn't find time to load it because of work. I'm now working almost FULL TIME at Shiki's...making me very tired and exhausted after work everyday which explains why I never seem to have time for anything else!! ;) Today is different...I've been down with a viral infection!! Since Saturday my head's been throbbing, ran a temperature, had sore throat, coughing, flu, diarrhoea...oh well you name it, I've got it!! I was so sick, I couldn't even go to work yesterday and this morning when I woke up I thought I might be able to do it, but then again...nope!! My head was soooooooo heavy and it felt like I had some heavy metal band jamming from inside my head!! So instead of going to work, I got a friend to replace me (thank goodness for understanding friends like Jaime!!) and off I went to Toowong medical centre to see a doctor (also coz Melissa reminded me that I have to see a doc...thanks Mel, so sweet of yoU!!)...was secretly hoping that the doctor would say something like, "I think you really have to consider working somewhere else...coz the hot pan and all the cooking and stress from there is doing you no good!!"...muahahhahahhah!! But instead he said, "You really need a few days of good rest before I get yourself back to work!!"...ahahahhahha, which is not quite a bad thing, at least the doctor thinks I need A FEW DAYS OF GOOD REST...Oh well, I really think I do...Initially I thought my wisdom tooth was gonna grow, that's why my gums were swallon and my head throbbing and the fever and all (coz I remembered when my little cousin was a couple of months old, and expecting his first tooth, he was down with fever and things like that...maybe I forgot I'm like 21 yrs old?!?!?)...well, turned out to be yet another prank!! No signs of wisdom tooth growing as of yet!! =) I hope my headache will go away soon, coz I don't think I can tolerate another day of sleeping in bed for more than 12 hours!! I so feel like smashing my head against the wall when I woke up this morning and it was still throbbing!! Enough is enough!! How many days do you wanna keep me off my job?!?!??! How much attention do you need from me?!?!?!??! Go away you headache nonsense!! Goooooooooo!! (",)